grandmas

I was much closer to my mom's mom than my dad's mom. I was far away from both of them. The only thing I felt connected me to my grandmothers was eating "grandma's home cooking". My mom learned how to cook from grandma, so it was like I grew up eating my grandma's food. And maybe her mom's and her grandma's too. My dad's mom lived on the other side of the country. Whenever she came to visit or whenever we were visiting her, she made sure to have plenty to feed us to make up for lost time.

Neither of them could speak more than "hello" and "thank you". They could barely pronounce my name. I never had a conversation with either of my grandmas. I think they always saw me as a child.

In the ICU, my grandma was hallucinating. She kept telling my mom, in Vietnamese, "make sure Andrew and Christina get their dinner".

The last time I saw my dad's mom, she was completely coherent. All she wanted to say (translated to us) was to do well in school and make her proud.

Somewhere between strangers and family. I'll never make them proud.